How to be a 21st Century Parent

Parents often feel caught between the pressures of today and worries about tomorrow. But we want build strong relationships with our children today that will help steer them towards a fulfilling life. St Swithun’s Coffee Plus is running an eight session course designed to help us to be even better parents.

Using DVD clips and a workbook, we’ll cover the challenges faced by parents of toddlers right through to teenagers. Topics include the gift of acceptance, the testing child, a mother looks back, building a sense of value, and defending the boundaries. There’s a chance to share ideas and advice with others, which is really useful and reminds you that you’re not alone.

For over 20 years, the author Rob Parsons has encouraged thousands of parents to forge stronger relationships with their children and become the best parents they can be. He and others share some lessons they’ve learned as parents – and some mistakes made along the way, too.

The course starts with an introduction on 23rd July from 10:00–11:30am in St Swithun’s church south aisle and there is a crèche for pre-school children.

All parents are welcome, however old your child is. We’ll continue on 24th September through the autumn term.

Loneliness is the greatest scourge of modern British society

From the Revd Tim Ling, Vicar of St Swithun’s, Bathford

Dear Friends,

‘Loneliness is the greatest scourge of modern British society.’

And, we might add, ‘busyness is the greatest tyrant’.

Last month a group of the St. Swithun’s church family went away for a weekend together to a place called Brunel Manor near Torquay, just a few minutes walk from the sea. There were 100 of us, aged from just a few months to well over 80. We had the most marvellous time. The sun shone, the food was delicious, the beds were comfortable, the grounds beautiful, we had four excellent talks from the Bible, and the children thoroughly enjoyed games & activities in their groups.

But perhaps the highlight of the weekend was simply being together. There was time just to sit and talk to people you may normally only get to say a few words to; time to walk in the gardens; time to go off with others to explore the treasures of the Devon countryside on Saturday afternoon; time to linger over a cup of coffee after meals; time for a night-time walk to the beach; time to discover that others were much better than you at tenpin bowling. It was lovely to see families enjoying their children together round the pool or in the sea when we all went to the beach; lovely to see young and old sitting chatting together in comfy armchairs; lovely to laugh together.

And there was lots of laughing; not least at the Saturday night revue, where masses of previously undiscovered talent came to light: there was poetry reading (including poems written by the reader and a deeply poignant rendition of that lost classic ‘Nelson’s farewell to his mother’(!)); the Goons were brought memorably to life again; fathers & sons, fathers & daughters performed together; and we heard the piano played in a way that put the ‘honky’ into ‘honky-tonk’!

Don’t get me wrong; we are far from perfect at St. Swithun’s. After all, people are people and we’re all the same, aren’t we - we have our good days and our bad. And a weekend away is not exactly the real world, either.

But having said all of that, it struck me that this is what Jesus was on about. Being a Christian really isnt about religion. Jesus hated ‘religion’. What he was on about was relationships - transformed relationships: people enjoying being with God and people enjoying being with one another.

This is what Christianity is all about: an end to loneliness away from God, leading to an end to loneliness away from other people. (And we all know how easy it is to feel lonely even when we’re surrounded by people.) A restored relationship with God leading to restored relationships with others - being part of a new community.

Okay, so a weekend away isn’t the real world; but it gave us a glimpse of what Jesus is on about. It showed us something worth aspiring to, something worth being a part of, something that can be for anyone. The church: it’s not about religion, it’s about relationships, it’s about community.

Tim Ling

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License.